Autumn’s gray skies (Feelings, Thoughts)

Autumn’s gray skies 

I see our sadness gathering the rain clouds, but it never rains, as those clouds are empty, all the water already ran down our cheeks… But still the clouds won’t leave the autumn skies and people don’t recognize, separate them from the real ones, we’re used to the gray and endless autumn’s sky… and feed them saying that we’re “fine”, only to break down when we’re alone… and, God, why it sounds so normal, like it’s the only life we know, like it’s the right way to live… are you okay with it?

We create those gray skies, we cover the sun with our own clouds of fear, doubt, sadness, denial, pain, hate, weakness… like we don’t deserve the sun, light and love… we voluntary sing the lullaby of endless sleep and self-negation… so we could justify our inner death and don’t move forward…

Some of us are cowards, some hurt or broken, other numb or given up… and the saddest part is that we’re fine with it… not ready, not trying, not wanting to help and be helped, heal and be healed, care and be cared for, ask and listen, give and take… because then we need to force ourselves to do something, for us, for others, for a better day… But we are worth to take and share the best this life and world can give us… all what we need to do is take a step and stretch a hand… to fall into the world full of love, light, understanding and acceptance… give all your love, hope, strength and you’ll receive three times more…

It won’t be easy in the beginning… the storm will take away your peaceful sadness, but the things you’ll discover will be worth it… maybe even strange… when you’ll rediscover your beloved ones, your friends, your home… see them in full of sun colors… because you can still fall in love with this world… you may not believe it… I didn’t too… I used to create those clouds like you…

I can see the sun breaking through the clouds, can feel how many eyes looked up and how many lips cracked a smile… and how many will do, when they’ll let go the clouds, their fear and doubt, other things keeping them down… and accept the sun, shining for every one of us…

Laura Dambite

Freedom

Freedom

You’re truly free,

My dear.

Cut off the ropes around your neck,

Cut off the hands on your shoulders,

And you’ll have only a road under your feet.

But do not wait the same

From others.

Freedom is personal thing,

A unique language,

Which only bugs in your head speak.

Also it’s a lonely trip,

With no real destination.

My dear,

Is this what you truly want?

© Laura Dambite, 2014.

A human will always long for freedom, even if he’ll never realize to an end, what freedom truly is. Is it only a desire burning deep inside? Is it only a flame dancing afar? Or is it loneliness with empty heart? Or something we already have, but are too blind to behold? I don’t know… do you?

Hello, my no one (Thoughts)

I know, you believe that your life has no meaning, you’re nothing more than rain drop falling down. Only to see how fast life runs by and how easy is it to crash against the cold ground. Meaningless, worthless like the cold rain in autumn morning, raining only to prove everything comes to an end and everything dies. Hitting hard against black umbrellas, like people already don’t hate it enough.

But dear no one, rain is nothing more, but life itself.

And, yes, it’s knocking, calling everyone out to close the umbrellas of ignorance and face the open sore, they try to push aside. People nowadays are afraid of living, afraid that one day they’ll realize, they’re nobody and their endless run means nothing.

They’re afraid to stop, question everything, they’re afraid to be you, to stand in the rain, to show the world how broken they are.

But are you broken? Did you ever were whole? Complete? Normal? Different? Maybe yourself? Someone else?

And did you ever felt, that we are living in some sick fantasy of a norm created by a psycho from a daydream about a perfect society?

Happiness

A autumn flower for you...

Happiness

You’re searching happiness,

It’s a word,

But life isn’t a dictionary

That you hold.

Because sky remains always grey,

Even if it’s clear,

And people still wait

For a better day.

Maybe we all live in shells,

And with a smile protect ourselves?

Maybe we forgot there’s something more,

Than we can buy in a store?

Because something fell apart,

When the years started to run.

From childhood to now,

Leaving us to question – what?

You’re searching happiness,

It’s near,

It’s beating in you,

Can’t you hear?

© Laura Dambite, 2010.

It’s an old poem, which I found in my pile of poems, stories and other writings. It’s from the time, when I loved to write over every piece of paper I had in sight and afterwards to lose them… sigh…

But I like this one, it’s a bit childish, a bit naïve and pure… it’s like the never ending hope that I had once inside… do I still have it? I doubt it sometime… And did I found my inner happiness?

Did you found yours?